Top five toys of 2023

Although we have already stepped into 2024, accompanied by raindrops, I am publishing a list of the five best toys of the past year, marked by the number eight and Lelo toys. There are two of them on the list, along with Fun Factory Volta, Rocks-Off Niya 2, and the low-cost vibrator Crushious Supernova.

We have a tie in fifth and fourth place: Crushious Supernova and Rocks-Off Niya 2.

Rocks-Off Niya 2

Rocks-Off Niya is a shovel surrounded by peonies. I evaluated it when the blossoms had opened, and my room was filled with a pleasant spring smell. A rainy afternoon, and I, flooded with the hormone of happiness because I bought myself a bouquet of peonies, invited me to bed for a pleasant meeting with Niya. The surface of the clitoral vibrator was large and ribbed, and the handle was long enough for the hand to rest. The vibrations are strong. In addition to the expected epic orgasm, I also experienced cleansing of the nasal canals and intense spasms throughout my body at the fifth stage of vibration. The Niya, a.k.a. shovel, warmed my heart and set the peach on fire. Silicone is smooth and gentle, while vibrations are the complete opposite of gentle. Just the way I like it. The toy lost a few points only because of the volume and one button, which prolonged my agony of waiting for an orgasm.

Crushious Supernova

Crushious Supernova shortened my days when I feared getting infected with COVID-19. The low-price toy surprised me positively in every way. In addition to simple packaging, Supernova and Niya are similar in excessive buzzing volume and intense stimulation, except that this toy has a pressure wave stimulation. It combines two functions, but each one works separately. If you are tired of the pressure wave, turn it around and turn on the vibration, or vice versa. Although at first, it seemed pointless to me that vibrations and pressure waves were separate, in the end, I found that it was better this way because this feature makes the vibrator double, as they claim in the toy's description. Unfortunately, this same feature prevents you from using vibration and pressure waves together, but it did not matter to me. The buttons were very responsive, but unfortunately, the patterns in this toy didn't leave me with an open mouth.

Lelo Nea 2

Lelo Nea 2 is small and, therefore, perhaps an underestimated toy, but it still triggers fireworks between my legs every time. The main charm of other toys is pressure waves, a technology that took me all the way from the gates of hell through purgatory to the gates of heaven. In the beginning, I was lost with the buttons, and to this day, I still can't remember that I have to press both buttons at once. I quickly came to a power that I thought was the highest, but I couldn't help but hold the button for a few more seconds. Hope dies last, and this time, my finger pressure triggered even stronger vibrations, which I did not expect even in my dreams. With the highest power and without fear of patterns that the vibrator does not offer, I experienced a kitschy, beautiful climax at the end of the day. 

Fun Factory Volta

Fun Factory Volta is the number-one vibrator for many women. I liked it, but unfortunately, it never became number one because of the long charging time and sticky silicone. In addition to the almost 19-centimeter vibrator, Fun Factory's package included exact instructions and a bright red magnetic charging cable, which remains my favorite. Volta is known for its beak, which offers a sufficiently stimulating tickle that quickly leads to orgasm. Bringing the Volta closer to the correct socket will do wonders – electricity will spread from your toes to the last hair on your head. It is suitable for those who like a stronger vibration, and I advise against it for those with a more sensitive clitoris, as you will spend more time moving the vibrator away from this erogenous zone than enjoying the orgasm. 

Lelo Enigma Wave

Lelo Enigma Wave was a toy I've wanted for a long time. It was all the more remarkable because I got it as a gift from Lelo. The toy brought me restlessness and calm at the same time. Enigma Wave has three motors: one, already well known to me for sonic clitoral stimulation (Sensonic technology); the other, which lies on the upper part of the neck and stimulates the entrance to the peach; and the third, the one whose feeling I missed in most toys, the one that touches all internal walls circularly, like an experienced finger (Wavemotion technology). My orgasm with this toy was epic. I was covered in slightly disturbing sensations with tingling, tears, and a sweet feeling like wind and lightning introducing the actual storm. And this one did come, but so did a squirt that quickly turned into a puddle on the sheet, followed by that well-known orgasm. I was lying half-dead on the bed. 

I have experienced many petit morts with the vibrators listed above. Still, the most memorable orgasm was the one brought to me by Lelo Enigma Wave and deservedly stood in the place of the best toy of 2023. Nevertheless, the above vibrators will keep me company in this and all the years to come.